The Key to Not Blowing Up Your Life

Why You Should Always Ask For Advice

Do you have a big decision to make? If you don’t have one looming right now you will at some point in the future. How you make that decision will set you up for success or could blow up your life and set you back years.


The big decisions I’m talking about are ones like: whether you should move, whether you should marry a certain someone..should you stay at your current job or is it time to move on–big decisions that will greatly affect your future, your friendships, and your finances.

I wish there was a chapter and verse you could turn to in the Bible which would answer these specific questions (and numerous others), but there isn’t.

So what’s a person to do?

The typical thing that I see happen in the church-world is people will ask for prayer from their small group or Bible study group about their big decision. They will pray for God to grant them wisdom but they will ignore the wisdom sitting in the room. God put wise people in your life for more than prayer.

Instead of filling your Bible study in on the details surrounding this monumentous decision and then asking for prayer, why not throw in one additional key sentence…

What do you guys think I should do?

Prayer is a great starting point (Phil. 4:6), but certainly not the finish line. Don’t fail to realize you possess a powerful key for not blowing up your life. What is it? It’s the other people sitting in the room. (Prov. 1:5, Prov. 7:4, Prov. 11:14, Prov. 12:15, Prov. 13:10, Prov. 15:22, Prov. 19:8, Prov. 19:20)

If you feel comfortable enough asking them to pray for you, why not ask them what they think you should do? Obviously they know you pretty well or you wouldn’t feel open to share the dilemma you’re facing. I’m guessing they are mature in their faith because you believe they will actually pray…so why aren’t you getting their input on the decision?

It seems silly and a bit superstitious to pray for wisdom all the while ignoring the wisdom sitting around you. How do you think God is going to actually give you the wisdom you’re praying for? He isn’t going to write the answer in the foam of your latte.


I rarely have someone come to me on the front end of a big decision and ask, “What do you think I should do?” But I have had numerous times where people have blown up their lives and come for help in putting Humpty Dumpty back together. It makes me sad because they could have saved themselves so much heart-ache if they would have just asked for input on the front end.

One of the reasons God has given you spiritual leadership (Heb. 13:17) is to help guide you. So why don’t you tap into it? When you are faced with a life-altering decision it is hard to see clearly because of emotional fog. You need others to speak into the decision who aren’t emotionally attached to an outcome.

When you get their advice don’t discount it. Really take it in and think about it. They see things from a perspective you don’t have. They love you and want the best for you. The foolish thing would be to go around and look for someone who will tell you what you want to hear. You don’t need someone who will agree with you, you need someone who will tell you the truth.

Don’t be afraid of the truth, the truth will set you free. It will set you free from the pain of bankruptcy, divorce, and heartbreak. All you have to do is ask wise people to weigh into your decision and then follow it.

By asking wise people what they think (and following it) it proves that you, too, are a wise person. Never make a life-altering decision without getting significant input from wise people further along than you.

Question: Who are the wise people that you are allowing to speak into the direction of your life? Share your answer on Facebook, Twitter, or LinkedIn.